Hi guys.
So I’m in the point of the year where everything is all about school work and school work and just a little more school work. Spring is soon over and summer is entering. Grades are being set and new bikinis, summer dresses and hot shorts are blossoming in the stores.
I’ve been trying out different ways to make my parents happy and proud about me, and I’ve worked really hard on getting good grades in school. Esp in math, since that is my biggest weakness among all subjects that I have. So I failed one test but my teacher was kind enough to let me pass the course since I passed all other test! I was really happy about it and I told my parents, but wow did I get a completely different response from them. Well, mostly from my dad.
I’m actually gonna quote him. This is what he said: “You are stupid, lazy and spoiled! Children in Africa, that are starving to death and living on the edge of life, get better grades than you do! You don’t deserve the things you have!”
WELL THEN FUCKING ADOPT A SKINNY ASS AFRICAN KID AND BE HAPPY! Forget all about me, I dont exist! He has no idea how much that hurt me… A father is not supposed to tell his own child these things. I couldn’t stop crying. I ran out of the house, just to get out of there. I was so fucking close to giving up completely and just jump off the bridge.
When I came back home he was all like: “What the hell is your problem? Why are you so pissed??”
SERIOUSLY?!?! WHAT THE FUCK IS MY PROBLEM?? I wanted to kill the man!
People should know how sensitive I am to the word starving, and when dad said “children in Africa that are starving to death”, that just hit my buzz.
My parents really dont know me. The only people who really know me are the ones that have read this blog. It’s pretty crazy though. Strangers that I have never met, and who I don’t know about know more about me than my own fucking parents.
I’ve missed this blog. I promise to try to update more often. It’s a shame that my father made me want to write here. Sorry.
Stay strong.
1 Comment
May 31, 2009 at 3:55 pm
Your dad is really an ……… I won’t say anything because maybe your not mad at him anymore. But I know what you mean. There’s no one who knows the real me! Not my friends and no one at home. Although they still act as if they know me better than I know myself. And for the African part your dad is wong I’m African and I suck in math. I’m good in the other things but I should spend more time on my homework! Things are getting stressed and everybody expects me to pass with only A’s it’s killing me. Although I want it for myself.
btw in the post all about boys you said you’ve to be thin because ofour work.Are you a model or what?